Sunday, October 10, 2010

Introducing: Killian Says


One of the inspirations I had for starting to blog again was this letter that I wrote to my brother, Mark, on behalf of Killian. I wrote it verbatim.


Uncle Mark,
I go through the tunnel and for the flowers, pooping along. Emailed of the button. Press one button and those have the button. The button is very good when you press it. When you read all the email back, ok? You're looking for clues. OK? OK? That button really good to touch but not to touch. You will have to have to....see that button? Press that button very harder, ok? You understand?
I'm gonna be Buzz Lightyear. I went through the tunnel, and i go up the steps and I cried. Then I want to go home. Then I want to want to...pooping along.
Happy birthday to you.
~Killian


As soon as I was finished typing this letter, I had a life-altering epiphany: All of this time I have been living under the same roof with my very own Engrish-producing pot of gold. Seriously- every sentence he utters is a golden nugget of hilarity. (Of course this is my opinion alone, and I realize that I may be the only one to find humor in these posts. I am perfectly fine with that.)

This post is very timely. Last night I had a conversation with friends about blogs. We talked about how some ridiculous people blog on behalf of their kids, and even their pets. Of course I agree that it's ridiculous...but that won't stop me from blogging on behalf of Killian. At least they really are his words. That has to count for something....right?

Stay tuned for more "Killian Says" and tell me if you want me to decipher any of it for you. I haven't figured out if it's funnier when you have an idea of what he's talking about, or if it's better left to your imagination.


PS: I have to give a shout-out to my dear friend, Carrie, who motivated me to blog again.

Look, I'm Dana! Howdy Howdy Howdy.

Remember me? I'm back! After a 6 month hiatus, I have found some new inspiration and motivation to blog.

Want to know more? Keep reading!

On my computer I have a folder of photos and things I have found that inspire me to blog, but I never have the motivation to actually do it. I think I was feeling jealous or insignificant when I noticed how many comments my friends and family get on their blogs. I know this is *pettifogging, but...well...there is no good excuse. (*I looked up synonyms for "petty" because I couldn't think of the word I was looking for - "shallow" - and one of the words that came up was "pettifogging", which is now my most favorite word ever.) Anyway, I have no good excuse. I was simply being shallow. I suppose you could call me a pettifogger.

So, I'm back.

For now.

Enjoy me while it lasts, bitches!

(Sorry, that wasn't nice, but I just watched Modern Family and I was feeling Mitch-y.)