Each week, Ryan's camp has a different theme. The first week was "Circus Arts & Crafts!", the second was "Dinosaurs!", the third was "Fun with Science!", the fourth was "Puppets!", and the fifth was "Fun with Books!". (I'll let you in on a secret: the exclamation points, although enticing, are incredibly misleading...)
The theme for this week, the 6th and final week, is "Down by the Shore!". The teacher, Mrs. Hunsberger (who can't possibly be older than 21 years, is married, and has a legitimate teaching degree), asked the group of 4-7 year-olds, "Where does sand come from?" I fondly reminisced, in my mind, that I had asked myself the very same question a week ago when I was standing on the Atlantic Ocean shoreline. My fondness quickly transformed into embarrassment when I realized that she was actually expecting, like, a real answer. My eyes darted around the circle as I tried to figure out if anyone else knew. Was I going to be outsmarted by a bunch of 4-7 year-olds?? Luckily, I was not. The teacher asked a few more times, with a look on her face and a tone in her voice that seemed to say, "Come on, dummies, you should know this!" (I must point out that she never offered a real answer.)
We watched 15 minutes worth of internet educational videos about fish and sand. I learned something that kind of blew my mind- did you know that a lot of sand is the result of digestion from the parrot fish? "Ingested during feeding, coral rock is ground up by the pharyngeal teeth. After they digest this it is excreted as sand thus at times creating small islands and the idyllic sandy beaches of the Bahamas and Caribbean." Small islands?! From parrot fish?! Pretty cool, huh? But that only explains some of the sand. Now, I'm not stupid- I know that sand is bits of ground up coral and rocks. But I still don't understand where it all comes from. There's just sooo much of it, unaccounted for (according to me).
Mrs. Hunsberger whipped out the next activity, which consisted of a plastic grocery bag full of large shells chunks of coral. We'll call this activity "Pass the Shell". Each item was passed around the large circle, starting with Ryan. He didn't seem too enthused, but I made sure he let me see each item before passing them along. (I revert back to my childhood at the sight of crayons and passing games.) A couple of shells were making their way around when a little girl named Ashley decided to turn the activity into "Listen to the Shell". Each child followed her lead. (As did I.) Another girl, Gracie, ruined this new version of the activity by obnoxiously voicing, "My brother told me it's just the blood in your ear that you're hearing! It's not really the ocean!" (Brat. It is the ocean. Your brother doesn't know sh**.)
Back to "Pass the Shell".
Mrs. Hunsberger and her assistant decided that the next object to go around was a sponge, but it was obviously a piece of coral. (Score 1 for me! Who's stupid now...) Another large shell came out of the bag. Ryan's buddy, Cory, creatively changed the activity to "Smell the Shell". Each child followed his lead. This time, I did not. I am extremely sensitive to smells, so I don't tend to intentionally smell anything that might be questionable, such as shells. I was very amused by the comments that came from this new version of the game. These are direct quotes that I documented:
Sam: It smells like COW MANURE!
boys: (giggling) Yeah!
girls: EWWW!
Cory: This one smells like bart!
Me: Like what?
Cory: Bart. That's barf and a fart.
(Of course it is. what was I thinking?)
Reagan: It smells like a STINKY OCEAN!
girls: EW!
Sam: Actually, it smells like PIG MANURE!
boys: (giggling) Yeah!
girls: EWW!
Cory: (to Sam) Do you have scissors at your house? Like, real scissors?
Sam: Yeah...
Cory: Can you invite me over so you can cut my nose off? It smells so stinky!
boys: (giggling)
Ashley: It tastes like a mountain!
This is where I stopped listening and busted out laughing with Mrs. Hunsberger.
Apparently the game had evolved suddenly and unexpectedly into "Taste the Shell".
1 comment:
LOL!! Oh my gosh I want to go to school with you and Ryan. I had no idea where sand came from. I think Mrs. Hunsberger is full of crap. And I love Pass the Shell... bart! Nice. I think it was inevitable that Smell the Shell would evolve into Taste the Shell. Awesome. :-) Hahaha...
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